Letting My Fears Get In The Way

By: Jonathan Macedo

28 Votes

Letting My Fears Get In The Way - Jonathan Macedo

Texas A&M University College Station

Jonathan Macedo

Fear is a powerful human emotion and a great motivator, it is what carries an individual to their greatest achievements. Fear was the necessity that carried my greatest growth. At a very young age, I remember watching, attentively observing people throwing away and disregarding their American birthright opportunities that so many people dreamed of attaining. It was not until I got older that I started to realize that the people I called family were the people I was afraid of becoming. This fear awoke my desire to help make a difference in those who were less fortunate and a determination in becoming the very man my family learned to resent.

I was born in Dallas, TX and lived there up until my family moved to a small town thirty-two miles east called Terrell. Terrell was the type of town where you grew up reading about how a penalty kick helped win the varsity soccer game in the newspaper’s spotlight headline. Life in my eyes seemed standard and ordinary, however, recent family trips to Pleasant Grove quickly changed my outlook. To put it into perspective, the residential neighborhood Pleasant Grove located in Dallas is where I first observed a series of encounters, such as automobile thefts in broad daylight, unlawful discharge of weapons and illicit drug offers from locals. This place which has a heavy Latino population and home to my dad’s side of the family was a shame in existence.

As my cousins were thrown into Pleasant Grove’s local high school they were approached and corrupted by their newly found friends. Their grades and class participation were quickly replaced by their new pastimes and hobbies. At first, I felt dejected and heartbroken at the fact that my cousins were following down a path of violence and delinquent behavior. And as time went by their mounting criminal offenses ranging from possession of drugs to illegal firearms made me want to help them earn a respectable lifestyle. As time showed individuals like my cousins blinded by their pride easily took offense to receiving help from an “arrogant” and “egotistic” individual like me. From that point forward their “arrogant” and “egotistic” accusations really hit home with me.

After what seemed like an eternal evaluation of my current state, I became aware of the fear that I had developed. This fear that had manifested itself directly in my life changed my ambitions. Aside from the delinquent activities, my cousins were involved in, my high school grades and 2.3 GPA practically placed me in the same group of people I feared to become. So from then on I set myself towards educational excellence and prosperity.

By making great sacrifices, I managed to graduate high school in three years with a 2.6 GPA. Knowing very well that my poor performance in school would not help me get straight into a University I decided to register at Trinity Valley Community College, majoring in Pre-Engineering. In an attempt to redeem myself I started college in 2014 managing to keep a focused perspective on school. At 60 credit hours later I have managed to outperform my expectations by attaining a 3.80 GPA, being inducted into Phi Theta Kappa and making it to college's Dean’s list. In the course of pursuing my ambitions of becoming an engineer, I have decided to continue my education by completing a Bachelor’s degree in Aerospace Engineering in the College of Dwight Look College of Engineering at Texas A&M College Station.

Not only would Texas A&M fulfill my ambitions, it would give me the opportunity to help fellow students too by becoming involved in Texas A&M’s clubs such as The Society of Hispanic Professional Engineers and Society of Mexican American Engineers and Scientists. These clubs filled with innovative minds alike would be able to give me a chance to actually help and promote the development of Hispanics and minorities to achieve educational excellence, economic opportunity, and social equality.